I
personally have concerns about raising a child as gender neutral or genderless,
like Storm. I just don't think there's enough data talking about the pros and
cons for me to make a real stance on the topic, so I'm left with my opinion. While
I agree that it's important for children to play with whatever toys they want
or dress however they like, but completely ignoring the fact that gender exists
doesn't seem positive for the child. Raising a gender neutral/genderless child
is also not an easy task. To raise a child this way, the parents have to vary
their tasks so that the child doesn't begin to pick up that mommy does these
things while daddy does these things. To raise your child without outside
influence of gender, the child would pretty much have to live in isolation; the
child can't go to the store or they would get some sort of gender influence
from other shoppers or the products around them. They couldn't go out and make
friends, leaving the child unable to make social connections and develop properly
socially. Even at holidays with family members, the family could possible slip
and reveal something about gender identity and the child. It's near impossible
to raise a child completely genderless or gender neutral while still
maintaining proper social development. Also, if your child has no idea of
gender and they go to school, they're going to be very confused about what the
other boys and girls are wearing and how they're acting, in addition to not
even being able to socialize with their peers since they never developed those
skills. There is also possibility of the child being bullied since they're not
like the other kids (http://www.parents.com/parenting/gender-neutral-parenting/).
Marly
Pierre-Louis attempted to raise her child as gender neutral, but she quickly
learned that it was easier said than done. She had friends and family poking at
her belly asking her baby boy to come out, often expressing how excited they
were to "play sports" with the little "champ." As soon as
their son was born she was bombarded with "boy" clothes from family
and friends, clothes in shades of blues and greens with words like
"sports," "champ," "superhero,"
"all-star," and things of that sort. She planned to balance the boys
clothes with girls clothes, skirts and dresses or frilly things in pinks and
purples. It turned out that a so called "progressive parent" as
herself found it difficult to put her son into a dress. If he asked, she
expressed that it was easier, but her putting her son in a dress was not as
easy as she expected. Hey, she has years and years of expected gender norms
weighing on her and her reputation as a good parent at stake. She found that gender-bending
doesn’t have to be about making her son “dress like a girl,” but more about
keeping his gender identity and worldview fluid and free of restrictions,
leaving him able to dress as freely and enjoy what he chose (http://www.mommyish.com/2014/02/17/raising-a-gender-neutral-child/a).
Overall,
I think it's important for the child to decide things for themselves, whether
it be the clothes they wear, the way they act, the way they want their hair, the
toys they play with, or whatever it may be. I think that teaching children what
gender is, but not forcing them to comply to gender norms is important. Sending
a child out into the world with no understanding of gender could have negative
effects in our society that heavily values gender and gendered things. Children also need structure of some sort or
else they enter the world thinking they can do whatever they want, and teaching
sex and gender might be more beneficial to them and lead them to have a general
understanding of life.